Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Time feels slowed down
This week, time is standing still. Jim is home, I have off..we feel like we are in a time that the outside world won't understand. We shared a Parker family favorite lunch of Buona Beef - good Italian style beef with Jim's dad. Finalized all the funeral details, then did some errands - the ones that people on normal time can't do during the week. We went and got our emissions tested on the car, stopped at 7/11 for Slurpees, and then went to the library. Normal things, just not on normal time.
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Last night after Mike and I left the funeral home we went to grab some food from this place called Thai Lagoon. As we both sat there, face to face, we reflected on some events that had taken place that evening. Mike mentioned to me how he has been feeling since his father has passed away, which has been almost three years now, and how the service last night effected him. He said he knows how Jim feels and how that brought out emotions of his own about his dad. As you already know it was snowing quite beautifully outside. We reflected on these things and I began to break down in tears the first time since this all has unfolded. I realized that there are signs of happiness all around, including the snow. For most people it is a beautiful sight to look at but for me the snow and everything else has become bitter sweet. So many things have saddened me over the past few months and has transformed the way I look at events and everyone else around me. Has this ever happened to you before?
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